Him We Proclaim

In a recent open letter to ministry parents (especially missionary parents), my friend Bret Taylor issued a warning against losing sight of your children amid the tasks of ministry. Here is my open response. Dear Bret, I want to thank you for writing your open letter to Ministry Parents. I have vivid memories of sitting in my living room talking about this very thing. You had come at my invitation to speak at the youth camp of the MK Youth Group I led in Costa Rica. We talked long into the night, and not without tears. Your letter takes me back to that room. These two things I took away from the letter: when the mission becomes more important than the family, it has become an idol; and the way to gauge if this is happening is “not because you said it – but because they felt it.” In this open letter, I’d like to address each of these, both as a friend and as a recipient, being a "ministry parent" myself. First, the matter of ministry being more important than family...

It is the regular experience for TCKs/ATCKs. It is, in a sense, what makes  the TCK. It brings confusion and tears, mixed loyalties and overcommitment. It is the wish, the desire, to belong.  To belong is a profound and human need. But those things that heigten this need in the TCK practically define largelly shape what a TCK is. Many TCKs spend enough time in their formative years to conform significantly, in thought patterns and values, to a society that is visibly, politically, culturally, and linguistically different from them and their forefathers. What are the odds of their really belonging there - in one generation. And yet, the experience shapes both their mind and affections, and (as many know), the TCK may feel more at home in their host country than in their passport country. But in significant ways they still do not belong, for belonging is more than an internal identification - it involves the acceptance among the people that is unlikely to happen in such a short ...